I think today has been the day that everything has sunk in that we are actually moving. And not moving just down the street- not just to a new house– but picking up my family and moving everyone and everything across the country. For some this is something they are used to, something that they have done many times before. But for me- I grew up in this town. I was born here in 1987 and while I moved cities I have always been in the Youngstown, Ohio area. The farthest I moved was Brookfield, which- is still Trumbull County. But in just 9 days we will be leaving… to start our new life in Florida.
I am excited. I am excited to be in the warm weather. I am excited for the new school that can offer SO much more than any school around here does. I am excited that I will only have to work part time and I will have a lot of time to spend with Colton. I am excited for our WONDERFUL house that thanks to David we are able to afford. There are all of these very wonderful and exciting things… but even with all of that I am sitting here crying. I am crying because I am scared. I am scared to move away from this town that I was born and raised in and know like the back of my hand.
I am sad because we have SO much here that we know and love. I am sad because I finally found a school I am comfortable with for Colton and that lets me be involved with as much as I want. I am sad because I have made friends with the moms at Colton’s School. I am sad because I am going to miss his swim instructor, Miss Cheri and so will he. I am sad because we won’t have the librarian that we had here. She is so sweet and always finds the best books for us to read. I am sad because I have SO many friends here that have kids and I wont have them in Florida. Instead I will be making all new friends. I will be finding new activities for Colton. I will be finding new play groups.
I WILL HAVE TO LEARN TO DRIVE IN FLORIDA!! I have always known how to get almost everywhere here. I learned to drive and where I didn’t know how to go I learned… at 16 so now as an adult I feel like I know where almost everything is. Every time we have visited Florida to get ready for the move David drove. I don’t even know how to get to the grocery store– or to the church. I am a great passenger… but when he is at work that does nothing for me.
But I will learn. I may be using GPS for the next few months. But I will learn. I will learn what our new home has to offer. This change is one of the biggest I have made but it is also one of the best ones. It is good for Colton, it is good for me, it is good for David, and it is what is best for our family. I fully and truly believe that.
This is also what I have always wanted. I wanted to move from this teeny town since I was in 7th grade. I said I was going to go away to UCLA to college- I wanted to get as far from Ohio as I could. But- that never happened. I fell is “love” got married and he was too attached to his mommy to ever leave Girard. Heck when we moved to Brookfield she was over our house every.single.day >.< So there went my dream of getting away from here. Then I got pregnant and wanted to be close to my family so Colton would have them… well that isn’t really a reason to stay anymore because they all work and have their own thing they do so we don’t see them all that much. So I am happy. I am happy I am finally getting the opportunity to leave my roots, grow stronger, be a better, more rounded person and provide my family with a better life. These are all great things. But I will still miss everyone I am leaving behind. I think Colton will learn to write letters really quickly because we will definitely be writing a lot to our friends back in Ohio. Oh and with NEW technology we can Skype with grandma and LaLa.
So- for tonight. Emotional breakdown is over. I am looking forward to all the great things this change brings us. I am looking forward to making new friends, joining a new PTA, getting Colton in new activities, joining a new church, and most of all… getting away from all the drama that comes with living in the same town that you went to High School in 😛